Dr Newton's Law

Well, here I am again with something more from the depths of the archives.... some very light banter. A long way back I had a few problems with Kidney Stones, I visited the Launceston General a few times over the years,  the following is my memory of one particular patient in my Ward.....sure hope twill cause a smile.  😄

DR. NEWTONS LAW

WELL I TOOK ANOTHER TRIP

TO THE HOTEL ON THE HILL,

IN THE BACK OF AN AMBO I DID TRAVEL

I WAS FEELING RATHER ILL,

YES,I'M BACK IN THE A.& E.

DR. CHAN – HE WAS THE MAN

THE MORE I SAID I WAS IN PAIN

THE LESS HE DID UNDERSTAND.

FINALLY UP TO THE WARDS

THIS TIME IT WAS 6D

I MET UP WITH DR. MONIQUE

I DIDN'T MIND HER LOOKING AFTER ME

WITH VIVIENNE, RACHEL, BARBARA AND CO,

I WAS SURELY IN GOOD HANDS.

THEN DR. NEWTON WAS ADMITTED TO THE WARD

HE WAS DETERMINED TO LEND AN UNSKILLED HAND.

NOW HIS KNOWLEDGE FAR OUTWEIGHED THE STAFF

HE WAS FULL OF DOCTOR STUFF

COME EARLY THURSDAY MORNING THOUGH

WE’D ALL HAD A BLOODY NUFF,

THE NOISE HE MADE WHEN FAST ASLEEP

WOULD CAUSE THE WARD TO SHAKE

SIR JAMES GUY WOULD AWAKE IN FEAR

“PLEASE DEAR LORD – NOT ANOTHER EARTHQUAKE”.

MR CROSSWELL WAS MADE OF TOUGHER STUFF

BUT HE WAS ON HIS BACK,

DR. NEWTON GAVE HIM SOME ADVICE

AND HIS BOWELS FLOWED LIKE WATER FROM A TAP

SO BY NOW THE BANTER BEING TOSSED AROUND

WAS BECOMING RATHER SERIOUS

BUT BETWEEN DR NEWTON AND US PATIENTS

WE WERE ALL QUITE DELIRIOUS

AND OF COURSE THE TIME HAD TO COME

WHEN WE HAD TO SEPARATE,

SIR JAMES BACK TO THE MANOR HOUSE

AND OF COURSE, ME BACK TO THE LAKE

LANCE HE HEADED OFF TO HOBART

TO MAYBE HAVE ONE LAST KICK

AND AS DR.NEWTON WALKED OUT THE DOOR

HE CONTINUED TO OFFER HIS ADVICE TO THE SICK!!

DARRELL B. PARKER

Weaver of words and emotions

23/11/99